Title TBD
by StellatheAlchemist
Summary: [Camp NaNoWriMo 2013] When one of England's spells goes wrong, Italy finds himself in a strange land called Amestris. In his place is a boy named Alphonse Elric, who wears armor from the middle ages. Can the two get home, and prevent their brothers from murdering everyone? Only time will tell. ((Rated T for language. Pairings depend on how you look at it.))
1. A Slight Mishap

**((So, I've had this idea for a while now. I'm doing it for Camp NaNo, so it'll probably update fast. Also, seeing as it's NaNoWriMo, this is all unedited, so I apologize for any weirdness or mistakes or just plain crappyness. Also, I really suck at titles, so suggestions are welcome.))**

The date was July 12, 2013. The nations of the world were gathered at England's house to celebrate his birthday (They weren't exactly sure _which _birthday it was, but it was his birthday, and that was the important part). Nearly all of Europe was there, along with some of Asia and the North American brothers, America and Canada. Even Russia was there, which England found rather terrifying, but he appreciated it nonetheless.

Things went rather as expected; There was the awkward greetings, the usual three-way brawl between England, France, and America, everyone avoiding England's scones, Japan sensing the mood, Russia terrifying everyone, Greece finding a stray cat… It was about as normal as a party at England's house could be. Despite the strangeness and occasional death threats, it was quite pleasant.

Finally, it was time for presents. Or, more accurately, America and his short attention span had decided it was time for presents.

"Sit down, old man," he told England, shoving him into a small plastic folding chair with balloons tied onto the back.

"Get your hands off me, you twit," England snapped, though not resisting very much. He reluctantly sat down in the chair.

"Right, you're going to open my present first because I'm America and that's how we do things," America announced, dropping a package with wrapping paper depicting racecars and electric guitars into England's lap.

"Happy birthday, you jerk," he said, grinning.

Smiling slightly, England carefully tore the wrapping paper off and revealed a box with a picture of a woman wearing some sort of fleece robe and a large "As seen on TV" stamp. Taped to the top of the box were gift cards for McDonald's, Taco Bell, and Burger King.

"…You got me a backwards bath robe," England said slowly, as if not entirely sure what he was holding.

"Dude, no! It's a SNUGGIE!" America insisted, acting as if the older nation had said something horribly offensive to him. "It's not a bathrobe, it's a blanket with sleeves! You know, so you can do shit without being cold!" he explained, glaring.

"…Right," England mumbled, deciding it would be best not to argue with the hot-headed American. He shrugged and put it aside.

Next came France. He presented England with a red paper bag with tissue paper and a rose sticking out of the top. Inside was an expensive designer suit from France. This was a pleasant surprise for England, who quite liked nice clothes.

"Not bad, git," England said with sincerity, too surprised to sound more snarky.

"I knew you would like it," France replied, chuckling. "If you need an occasion to wear it, I-"

"I still hate you," England interrupted, glaring.

France pouted slightly. "Oui. Well, I suppose some of us do prefer solitude."

England shot France a look, but ignored the comment, placing the clothes next to the blanket-bathrobe-thing from America.

The next present was given to him by both Spain and Romano, which wasn't too surprising.

"Feliz cumpleaños," Spain told him, while Romano snickered.

Suspicious, England carefully opened the package, wary of any traps it may contain.

Inside was a book titled "Cooking for Dummies".

"…Go to hell," England told Spain and Romano, giving them a look.

"It may prove useful to you, Inglaterra," Spain said sympathetically.

"Yeah, if-a you can even read it," Romano added, laughing like an idiot.

"You're lucky I'm in a good mood," England mumbled.

Next came Italy, who gave England a painting of the old Allies. Russia gave him a foot in a box; China gave him a Hello Kitty plushie; Canada gave him maple syrup. Japan gave him a katana, Germany gave him a pair of work boots, Prussia gave him an electric guitar, and Greece gave him an antique urn. There were various gifts from other countries, too.

Finally, all the presents had been opened. While the other countries went to go chat, England began carefully cleaning up the garbage.

"Hmm? What's this?" he wondered out loud, picking up a book that was lying on the table. It was black leather, with an intricate circular array carved on the front in white. It was studded with rubies and had gold edging. It was clearly a magic book, but not one England owned, or even recognized.

"Did you get this for me, my friends?" he asked the supernatural beings crowding around him. They all shook their heads.

"Get what for you?" America asked, not noticing the creatures.

"Oh, nothing," England mumbled distantly, slowly tracing his fingers over the array on the cover. It was certainly a beautiful book, although something seemed a bit off, and he didn't recognize the array. Intrigued, he opened the book and flipped through the pages. Something immediately caught his eye: A teleportation spell.

_Well, this could certainly be useful… It would make travel much easier, _England thought. _I'll need someone to test it on, though. But who?_

He looked around the yard, scanning the crowd for someone he could use. Russia was definitely out of the picture, and probably China as well; America didn't believe in the occult, and Germany was terrified of supernatural things; Canada- _Wait, who was I looking at again?_ France would never agree to it… Suddenly, a brilliant thought occurred to England.

_I know! I'll use Italy! He's so slow and gullible, I can easily convince him to help me. It's perfect! _England thought, smiling mischievously. Proud of his wonderful plan, he casually strolled over to Italy.

"Ciao, Britain!" Italy said, waving enthusiastically. "Did you like-a the painting?"

"Yes, it's lovely," England replied, not terribly interested. "Oi, Italy, how would you like to help me out with some magic?"

"Oh, yay! I love magic! It's so cool!" Italy exclaimed. "What can I do?"

"Follow me and I'll show you."

"Ok~!"

England hid the book in his jacket and led the way to his basement, with Italy skipping along excitedly behind him.

"Alright, wait here," England told Italy, pointing to a small stool in the corner.

"Ok," Italy replied, nodding and sitting down.

Taking the book out, England quickly found the page with the teleportation spell and read it carefully. Double-checking to make sure he understood everything, he retrieved a piece of white chalk from the desk drawer and began to draw the array on the floor.

"Ooh, pretty! Magic circle!" Italy commented, watching England work. He drew graceful curves and carefully arranged, perfectly straight triangles. He put old zodiac symbols at various points, and wrote cryptic inscriptions in elegant cursive. Finally, he stood up.

"Alright, it's finished," he announced. "Italy, please stand in the middle."

"Si," Italy replied, doing as he was told.

"_Aperi januam_

_I supra portam._

_Corpus, Mens, Anima_

_Fuligo et Album, Vita et Mors._

_Fac hanc mercaturam aequipollentem,_

_Et Aperi januam_," England chanted, and pressed his hands to the circle. It immediately began to glow, surrounding Italy with a bright blue light.

"Wow! So amazing! Hey, England, what's going to happen?" Italy asked curiously.

"Well, assuming I did this right, you should be teleported outsi-"

Suddenly the glow turned from blue to an eerie dark purple. The torches went out, and wind swirled around the room.

"Uh… Britain? I-is this normal..?" Italy asked nervously.

"I… I don't think this was supposed to happen," England replied, slightly horrified.

"Italy? Are you down here?" called Germany's voice from the hallway. Before Italy could answer, a portal of sorts opened in the middle of the room, and tiny black hands reached out and grabbed him. He screamed.

Upon hearing Italy's scream, Germany immediately ran into the room.

"Italy! What's wrong?!" he demanded, throwing the door open.

"Germany! Help me, please! I can't-a get away! GERMANY!" Italy screamed, the hands pulling him in despite his struggles.

"Wh-what the hell is this?!" Germany shouted, horrified and confused. Shaking his head to clear it, he put all his questions aside. Italy needed him.

He grabbed a sword from the wall and began slashing at the hands, hoping to sever them. To his surprise, the sword went right through them.

"No! Let go of me! I don't want to go with you! GERMANYYY!" Italy shrieked, terrified and crying.

"I won't let you take him!" Germany shouted, grabbing Italy's hand and pulling as hard as he could, but it was too late. Italy's tear-filled eyes met Germany's for a brief moment before the portal closed, with Italy gone.

"ITALY!" Germany screamed. He turned to England, who had been standing there the whole time, in a daze.

"You!" Germany growled, grabbing England's shirt collar and slamming him against the wall. "What the hell did you do?! WHERE IS ITALY?!"

"I-it was an accident, I swear! It was supposed to be a teleportation spell!" England stammered, legitimately scared.

"Shut up, you bastard! Just tell me where he is!" Germany snapped.

"Ah… He was supposed to be sent outside," England began, "But-"

Ignoring him, Germany immediately ran outside.

"ITALY!" he shouted. "WHERE ARE YOU?!"

"What the hell do you want, potato bastard?" Romano grumbled, glaring.

"Romano! Italy's missing!" Germany exclaimed, pausing to catch his breath.

"What?!"

"Eh? Something happened to Ita?" Spain asked, shocked. The whole crowd went silent, worried and confused.

"Where is he?! What did you do to my fratello?!" Romano demanded, getting ready to punch Germany.

"It wasn't me! Britain did it!" Germany replied, pointing. Everyone suddenly started talking again.

"What happened?"

"Is Italy alright?"

"How could he do something like that?"

"Not poor petit Italie!"

"This is a disaster, aru!"

"No way, man! You can't be serious!"

"Surely Germany is joking, da?"

"I hope Italy is ok…"

"Everyone please calm down," said Japan, always the voice of reason and calmness.

"How do you expect-a me to do that?! You heard potato head! My brother's missing, damn it!" Romano shouted, slamming his fist down on the table.

"Romano, settle down, por favor," Spain insisted, putting a hand on Romano's shoulder. "Let's listen to what Japan has to say."

Everyone turned their attention to Japan, who cleared his throat awkwardly.

"I'm sure there is a reasonable explanation for this," he said. "Germany-san, would you please tell us what happened?"

"I was in the house looking for Italy, when I heard him scream, and-" Germany gratefully accepted a beer offered to him by Prussia, and chugged it down, "…There were these… _things_... These hideous black hands, they were grabbing him and pulling him back, and somehow disintegrating him at the same time. I tried to stop them, but nothing worked."

"Where did this happen, aru?" China asked.

"In a room in the basement. There was some sort of circle design on the floor," Germany explained.

"Woah, that is creepy, man!" America shouted. "What the heck were you doing, Britain?!"

"I was… I was just trying a new spell," England replied quietly. "I found a spell book with the presents, and it included a teleportation spell, so I decided to test it out on Italy. I had no idea this would happen… I never wanted any of this… I feel awful," he admitted, biting his lip and staring at the ground.

"Of course you didn't, England. It wasn't your fault," Canada said soothingly, putting a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Like hell it wasn't! This is what happens when-a you mess around with dark magic!" Romano argued.

"Look, pointing fingers isn't going to get us anywhere," Canada replied, giving him the closest thing to a dirty look Canada could possibly give.

"Come on guys, accusing Britain won't help get Italy back," America insisted. Canada sighed.

"I say we work on finding a way to get him back," Prussia agreed. "We can deal with the rest later."

"Let's have an emergency meeting tomorrow," Russia suggested.

"Why don't we check the room? For all we know, Italy could be back there again," Spain pointed out. There were murmurs of agreement.

"Alright. Prussia, Japan, Romano, Spain and I will all go investigate the basement," Germany announced, having calmed down signifigantly.

"Hai," Japan replied.

"He better be there…" Romano mumbled darkly.

"Relax, amigo," Spain told him. "I'm sure Ita will be fine."

The five nations hurriedly went to the basement, all praying that Italy would be there, safe and sound.

What they found was most certainly not Italy.


	2. Missing Persons

**((Yeah, this chapter is totally unrealistic… But like I said, this whole thing is completely unedited. So yeah, it kinda sucks. xD I'll likely redo a lot after Camp NaNo is done, but for now I'm just uploading whatever I get written.))**

The Elrics were sitting in a private room in the library, researching as usual. The entire table was covered in books, as was the floor, and the couch, and the chairs… Somewhere in that mess the two boys had managed to make room for a few papers, but besides that, it was books as far as the eye could see. The only apparent objects that WEREN'T completely covered in books were the two teenage boys furiously scribbling away on loose paper, constantly checking old books and alchemically encoded manuscripts.

This behavior continued for a very long time, until finally the silence was broken by a loud and drawn-out growling sound.

"I think it's time for lunch," Al said, amused.

"Yeah, you're probably right," Ed agreed. He stood up slowly and stretched, yawning a little.

Al also stood up, carefully stacking the papers and putting down the book he had been holding. Suddenly the lights began to flicker and then went out, and wind filled the room, flipping through books and tossing papers everywhere.

"What the hell..?" Ed said quietly, confused. His eyes widened in fear as electricity began to crackle around the room and a portal appeared.

It was just like That Day. The day he nearly lost his little brother.

Ed's trance was broken by Al's hollow screams as the Gate's hands grabbed at him, pulling him back and disintegrating his metal body.

"Al! No!" Ed shouted, pushing the disturbing memories aside and reaching for his brother's oversized hand.

"Not again! No, please! BROTHER!" Al screamed, absolutely terrified.

"Leave him alone, damn it! We haven't even done anything!" Ed's voice was wavering, and his usual confident expression was replaced with one of pure fear. He watched in horror as Al disappeared through the Gate.

Ed slowly sunk to the floor, his entire world shattered. Al, his Al, his precious little brother who meant more than anything to him, was gone. Just like that. Gone. For no reason at all. He didn't even know why, or how to get him back. Without even realizing it, Ed was crying.

Al's gone.

He's gone.

Gone.

Alphonse…

Suddenly the air crackled with energy once again, and the portal reopened.

"Al?!" Ed said hopefully, jumping to his feet. To his surprise, what came out of the portal was not his brother at all.

It was a young man, probably in his 20s, about the same height as Mustang and somewhat skinny. He had fair skin and brown hair, with long bangs parted in the middle and a strange curly hair sticking out on the left side. His eyes were closed, and he wore a blue military uniform of some sort.

He seemed very confused. Luckily, he had already been introduced to someone: Ed's fist.

"Aah! What was that for?!" he exclaimed, flinching.

"WHERE THE HELL IS MY BROTHER?!" Ed shouted, slamming him into the wall.

"I-I don't know what you're talking about! Please, I'm innocent! Leave me alone! I'll-a do anything! Don't hurt me! I swear I didn't do it, it was probably Romano! DON'T HURT ME!" the man stammered, crying.

"LIAR!" Ed snapped, punching him again.

"Stop, please! I didn't do it, I swear I didn't! I don't even know who you are! Please leave me alone!" he begged, terrified and confused.

"I will leave you alone," Ed snarled, "When you tell me where the hell my brother is!"

"I'm-a telling you, I don't know! I don't know who you are or where I am! I just want to go home!"

"SHUT UP!"

Ed's rage was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Mr. Elric, for the last time… If you cannot be quiet, I'm going to have to ask you to leave," the librarian said, clearly losing patience.

"Fine! Whatever!" Ed snapped. He grabbed the man by the back of his shirt and began angrily dragging him out of the room, ignoring his protests.

"Let me go! Where are-a you taking me?! I want to go home! GERMANY!" he shouted, flailing as Ed dragged him down the front steps.

"Just shut up and walk," Ed said bitterly. He nodded tearfully and stood up, which allowed Ed to let go of him.

"If you try ANYTHING, I will punch you again," Ed warned him. "So no running away."

"Si," he said sadly.

They walked for a few blocks in silence, Ed radiating anger while the man behind him looked terrified and waved a small white flag.

"Um… Where are we going?"

"You don't need to know," was Ed's only reply. He stopped at a large, intimidating-looking facility and stomped up the steps, with the other man carefully following him.

Ed led him down a hall and through a few doors, ignoring the looks of the various soldiers throughout the building, and angrily kicked down a certain door. Being used to this, nobody in the room so much as flinched.

"Hey, chief," Havoc said, waving. "How's the research going?"

"It's going wonderful," Ed said darkly, marching straight into Colonel Mustang's private office and kicking the door down.

"Ah, Fullmetal. Have you learned any manners yet?" Roy said, not even bothering to look up.

"Shut up, bastard! I don't have time for your games!" Ed shouted. This concerned Roy. It wasn't the usual annoyed, bratty sarcasm; Ed's voice sounded genuinely angry, a very rare thing.

"Something wrong?" Roy asked, hoping everything was ok.

"Al's missing!" Ed replied.

This got Roy's attention.

"What do you mean, 'missing'? Did he get kidnapped again?"

"No! Yes! I don't know… That stupid portal came and took him! It took him and I don't even know why and he's gone!"

For the first time, Roy noticed the slight panic in Ed's voice and the tears in his eyes. Unsure what to do, he did the only thing he could think of: Hug him. Awkwardly.

Too upset to resist, Ed leaned against his superior, resting his head gently on his chest.

"He's gone… Al's gone… It was just like That Day… He's gone…"

"Hey, don't talk like that. We'll get him back," Roy promised. He awkwardly released Ed. "Do you have any leads?"

Standing up and blushing slightly, Ed shrugged.

"…Well, uh… sorta. Just this guy," he replied, pointing to the man who was standing nervously in the doorway. "A few seconds after Al disappeared, the portal came back and spit him out."

Roy looked the man over, frowning as he considered what to make of him.

"Any idea who he is?" he asked Ed.

The man straightened up and wiped his eyes on his sleeve.

"M-my name is Italy Venezziano," he said, attempting to look serious.

"I see. Well, I'm Colonel Roy Mustang, and this is Edward Elric," Roy replied. "I take it you've already met him."

"He punched me," Italy said, pouting. Roy gave Ed a look.

"What? He could have been the one who took Al!" Ed argued.

"First off, I doubt that. You said it was the Gate or whatever that took him, right?"

"Well, yeah, but-"

"And even if he does have something to do with it, beating him up isn't going to help. We need answers, not anger outlets."

Ed crossed his arms and mumbled something about "Stupid Bastard" and "I can do what I want".

"Now then, do you know what caused it?" Roy asked, grabbing what was probably important paperwork to write on the back of.

"No, I have no idea. We were just about to go eat lunch, and then… It happened. No idea why," Ed said, a hint of sadness in his voice.

"Well, that's just great." Roy sighed and put a hand on his forehead.

Italy tentatively raised his hand.

"…Uh… I might-a know a few things," he said quietly, hoping not to get punched again.

"Do tell," Roy said, polite yet suspicious of the stranger.

"Well… um… W-we were at England's house for his-a birthday party, you see," Italy began. "England asked me to help him with his magic, so I said 'Ok!' and then we went-a to his creepy basement. Then he drew a pretty circle on the floor and there was a biiiiiig light, but then it got all cold and purple and-a windy and these creepy hand things came and pulled me back and I couldn't get away and then Germany was sad, and that's all I remember."

"Wait… Did you say circle? What did it look like?" Ed asked, hoping it wasn't what he suspected.

"It was like… ve… Let me show you." Italy retrieved a piece of paper and a pencil from the desk and began sketching.

"All done! Here it is," he announced, showing the paper to Ed and Roy. Roy's eyes widened.

"…Edward, tell me that isn't what I think it is." He had seen the transmutation circle the day he met the Elrics, and all the horrors that came with it.

"I think it is," Ed replied, going slightly pale.

"Ve? Did I mess up?" Italy asked, worried.

"No, no, it's not you… just…" Ed sighed. "Someone's an idiot."

"Seems like there may be more to this than we think," Roy said. He turned to Italy. "Where did you say you were from?"

"Italy! Well, north Italy, anyway."

"...Wait, let me get this straight… You're Italy from Italy?" Ed asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Si! But if it bothers you, you can call me Feliciano Vargas," Italy replied.

"Where is Italy, anyway?" Roy asked.

"It's in Europe, near Spain and France and Switzerland and Greece…" Italy began listing places his country was near.

"I've never heard of any of those places," Ed whispered to Roy. "I think he's crazy."

Roy nodded in agreement and got out a map of Amestris and surrounding countries.

"Can you show me on the map?" he asked Italy.

Italy looked at the map, rotating it various ways and frowning in confusion.

"I've never seen any of these places before," he announced.

"Wait, are you serious? You've never seen Amestris?" Ed repeated, dumbfounded.

"Ve? What's that? Is it part of America?"

Roy sighed.

"This is going to be a long day."


	3. Welcome to Earth

**((So apparently this story got ridiculously popular in a very short amount of time. It's been 5 days and it already has 94 views, which is… Kinda insane. O_o' And also 6 reviews, all demanding updates. I'm working as fast as I can! D:  
To be honest, I have no idea why everyone loves this story so much. I mean, yeah, it's fun… But it's so unrealistic. xD It's so hard trying to write 2 worlds at once, especially with so many characters. orz I'm probably going to edit the crap out of this after Camp.  
Also, it still needs a title, so suggestions are more than welcome! Even if you think it sounds lame, give me whatever you've got. I'm desperate here. ._.'))**

Germany, Prussia, Japan, Spain, and Romano stood in England's basement, staring in horror at the strange thing that had replaced Italy.

It appeared to be a large, full-body suit of armor, like England used to wear back in medieval times. It was too dark to see if there was anyone inside, although it could be assumed that whoever was in there was likely very tall. It was lying on the floor on its side.

"What is this..?" Japan whispered, not sure what to do.

"I think it's a suit of armor," Spain replied. "Inglaterra used to wear them when we fought. Ah, memories…" He let out a sigh of nostalgia.

"Ja, but where's Italy? And how did this get here?" Germany added, frowning.

"Chigi! It moved!" Romano shouted, hiding behind Spain.

Sure enough, the suit of armor's hand was twitching. The rest of it also slowly began to move, and it sat up.

"What… I'm not dead?" it said confusedly, in a voice that suggested it was probably a woman. The armor looked around the room.

"…This isn't the Gate," it announced, not noticing the others.

Germany cleared his throat awkwardly, ignoring his terrified companions.

"Um… Hallo. My name is Germany. Who are you?"

"I'm Alphonse Elric," the armor replied. "What is this place?"

"England-san's basement," Japan said. "My name is Japan."

"And I'm Prussia," Prussia added.

"Spain. Nice to meet you!"

"Italy Romano, bastard."

"Hello," Alphonse said, waving.

"Alright, let's-a cut to the chase here. Where the hell is my idiot brother?" Romano demanded, glaring.

"I'm sorry, I don't know," Alphonse said apologetically. "I really don't know how I even got here…"

"What do you mean, you don't know?!"

"Calm down, Romano," Spain interrupted. "I'm sure it's not his fault."

"Obviously it is! Somehow!" Romano argued.

"Enough!" Germany shouted, causing everyone in the room to jump. "We are not going to make any progress by arguing amongst ourselves."

"Shut up, potato freak," Romano said, flipping him off.

"Hey, don't you talk to West like that, pasta face!" Prussia ordered.

"I'll talk to the bastard however the hell I want!"

"Ano, please stop-"

"You wanna mess with me, punk? Huh? I'll have you know I'm a former Teutonic Knight!"

"Oh, I'm-a so scared! What are you going to do, drown me in beer?"

"Romano, please-"

"OH, THAT IS IT!" Prussia launched himself at Romano, getting ready to punch him. To his surprise, Romano immediately bolted, running quite quickly out the door. Prussia, meanwhile, crashed into a table.

"What the hell?!" he shouted, rubbing his face.

"You forgot he's Italian, brother," Germany said. "Running away is his speciality."

"Tch. Stupid pasta face. I should have known he wouldn't be brave enough to fight The Awesome Prussia," Prussia mumbled. Spain, meanwhile, had gone off to find Romano.

"Now that that's over with, let's get back to business," Germany decided. "What are we going to do with him?" He pointed to Alphonse, who was still awkwardly sitting on the floor.

"Well, we can't just leave him in England's basement," Prussia said, thinking.

"He'll need a place to stay," Japan agreed.

Germany sighed.

"I suppose he'll have to stay at my house," he announced reluctantly.

"O-oh! You don't have to do that, really," Alphonse said awkwardly, embarrassed. "I don't want to trouble you. I can find somewhere on my own…"

"Nein, it's perfectly fine," Germany replied politely.

_After all, if he can help find a way to get Italy back…_

"Are you sure?" Alphonse asked, not wanting to be a burden.

"Ja. It's not too far from here, anyway."

"Well, thank you very much."

Germany nodded.

"We should probably tell the others," Japan pointed out. Just as he said that, a crowd of people showed up in the doorway.

"Yo, Germany! We heard you found some sorta robot or somethin'," America said, poking his head in the door in an attempt to see what was going on. Germany immediately pushed him out.

"Is everything alright, aru?" China asked. "Romano ran up here with Spain following him, and then they said something about a suit of armor…"

"Um, hello," Alphonse said, waving awkwardly.

"Ni hao," China replied, bowing. "I'm China. What's your name?"

"Alphonse Elric. Nice to meet you."

"Alright, get out of my way," England demanded, pushing everyone out of the doorway and marching in. "Would one of you gits care to tell me what's going on?"

"We came down here and found Alphonse-san on the floor," Japan explained, nodding towards Alphonse.

"I'm really sorry about all this," Alphonse said. "I don't really know how I got here…"

Everyone looked at England.

England blushed, embarrassed, and put on a serious face. "Yes, well, my name is Great Britain and this is my house."

"Pfft, more like somewhat-average Britain," America said, smirking.

"Shut up, you wanker," England replied, giving America a dirty look.

"It's still his birthday, Amerique," France pointed out.

"Yeah, yeah…"

"Um, I don't mean to be rude, but do any of you know how I got here?" Alphonse asked quietly.

"…It's a long story," Germany said, sighing. "I think it's best we wait until tomorrow's meeting."

"Hey, speaking of the meeting, what time is it? And where are we having it, anyway?" America asked, sipping a cup of soda.

"We can have it at my house," Japan offered. "How about noon?"

"Sounds good to me!" America agreed. The others also voiced their agreements.

"In that case, I think it's time we all headed home, aru," China said.

"I agree," Germany added. "It's late and we'll need to get some sleep if we're going to have a meeting tomorrow."

"I'm not leaving," Romano announced, crossing his arms.

"What do you mean, you're not leaving?!" England demanded. "This is my house, you know!"

"Shut up! You're the one who made Venezziano disappear, so you're just going to have-a to deal with it!"

"Now now, Romano," Spain said, attempting to get him to calm down. "He has a point. I don't think we'll learn much tonight, so why don't you just come home with me, si?"

Romano thought it over for a moment, and reluctantly gave in. "Fine. But don't think you're totally off the hook," he told England, glaring.

"I understand," England mumbled.

And so the nations of the world gradually returned home, with Al following Germany nervously.

"Um… Excuse me, Mr. Germany?" Alphonse said quietly.

"Ja, what is it?"

"Oh, uh, I was just wondering… Is my brother here?" he asked nervously, staring at the ground.

"I don't know. What does he look like?" Germany replied.

"Well, he's about this tall, and he has long blonde hair. He wears a red jacket and black clothes, and he usually looks kinda angry," Alphonse described. Germany thought about it.

"…Nein, I don't think I've seen anyone who looks like that," he announced.

"Oh… ok then," Alphonse said reluctantly, sighing.

"Perhaps we can find him tomorrow, assuming he's here," Germany added, hoping to cheer up the boy at least a little.

"Maybe… I just hope he's ok."

Finally, they arrived at Germany's house. Germany took his keys out and unlocked the door, pausing for a moment before remembering that the little Italian who was so often inexplicably in his house was no longer there. Feeling a pang of loneliness, he went inside and turned the lights on.

"Alright, make yourself at home. The guest bedroom is that way, bathrooms over there, and the kitchen is down that hall. Do whatever you like, just don't make a mess and stay out of my room," he told Alphonse.

"Got it. Thanks again for letting me stay here," Alphonse replied politely.

"Ja, don't mention it. I'm going to bed now," Germany announced. "Call me if you need anything, I guess." With that, Germany went off to bed.

He quickly washed his hair and took off his jacket and boots, so he was wearing nothing but a white cotton tank top, underwear, and his uniform pants. Sighing, he fell onto the bed, exhausted.

"Oh, Italy… What have you gotten yourself into this time?" Germany mumbled into his pillow. Much as he hated to admit it, he already missed him. Annoying though he was, there was something about him that always made Germany happy. He never had the heart to deny him his pasta, or kick him out when he snuck in his bed naked at night, or make him run extra laps. Italy was one of the few people he could truly call his friend. Most people didn't really want to be friends with him, especially after World War II, even though it hadn't been his fault. And yet, somehow, Italy didn't care that he was mean and scary and that he had done horrible things. At the end of the day, he was always there, waving his white flag and producing pasta from thin air and demanding that Germany carry him.

And now he was gone. Italy, the sweetest and most adorable person Germany knew, was gone. All because stupid England had decided to take advantage of his love of helping people and use him for his dangerous experiments. Even if England hadn't intended for Italy to get hurt, it was still his fault, and Germany had a feeling it was going to take all his strength to not strangle him at the meeting.

_Stupid Britain… This is all his fault,_ Germany thought angrily. He should know better than to use humans for experiments.

Remembering that he had a long day ahead of him, Germany decided to take his own advice and go to sleep. He reluctantly settled into bed, and soon fell asleep.

He did not sleep well that night, dreaming of being unable to rescue Italy from various dangers. When he woke up alone in his bed, he couldn't help but feel a deep sadness.


	4. Pasta and Serial Killers

**((This chapter is the pathetic result of my brain being fried from the last weekend of faire. Read it and weep from the stupidity. I don't even remember what chapter this is.**

**Also, to whoever mentioned people not noticing Al's armor… They did, they just haven't exactly realized he's not just wearing it. Considering the sort of outfits France and Turkey wear, I doubt they find it too strange. xD))**

Roy sat in his office, trying to help piece together what little information they could get out of Italy. He didn't appear to be all that bright, and it seemed like no matter what they asked him, it all eventually came back to either pasta or some guy named Germany. Needless to say, both alchemists were rather frustrated. Especially Ed, who was currently beating up Roy's desk.

"Stop that," Roy told him. "That desk is expensive, you know."

"I think we have better things to worry about than your precious desk," Ed replied, giving it an extra-hard kick for emphasis.

"Yeah, and beating it up isn't going to help us at all, so stop being an idiot and help me out."

Ed mumbled a few curse words under his breath and reluctantly stopped, opting to sit on top of the desk instead.

"I want Al back," he announced, pouting.

"Thanks for the update, I'll call the newspapers," Roy replied sarcastically.

"Oh, shut up. You'd be just as pissed as I am if your brother was missing."

"I don't have any brothers, Fullmetal."

"…Yeah, well, whatever! My point is, I'm upset," Ed concluded.

"I think I got that part."

Ed sighed. "It's just… I don't even know how this happened. We were sitting there researching one minute, and then the next, bam, he's gone. For no real reason at all."

"And then there's that Italy guy," Roy added. "Didn't he say there was a transmutation where he was?"

"Yeah, and it seems like the two are connected somehow, but… It just doesn't make any sense," Ed agreed, throwing a pen in frustration.

"I've never heard of connected transmutations before," Roy said.

"Neither have I. And it seems like smiley there is either delusional, or from an entirely different planet."

Just then, there came a knock on the door.

"Come in," Roy said loudly. The door slowly opened, revealing a nervous-looking Havoc.

"Uh… Colonel? There's some crazy guy in the kitchen… I have no idea where he came from," Havoc said awkwardly.

"Let me guess… Blue uniform, brown hair, ridiculously cheerful?"

"Yeah, that's him."

Roy sighed. "Just ignore him," he told Havoc.

The "crazy guy" in question skipped into the office, carrying a large pot, several plates, a jar of tomato sauce, and forks.

"Ciao! I made pasta for everyone!" he announced, putting the pot on the desk and scooping generous servings of pasta onto each plate.

"Wait, since when did we have spaghetti?" Ed asked, bewildered. Havoc just shrugged.

"I smell food," Breda said, wandering into the office.

"Hello! Would you like-a some pasta?" Italy asked, waving.

"Hey, my office is NOT a dining room," Roy interrupted. "Take it outside, would you?"

"But-"

"Out," Roy said firmly, pointing to the door.

"Si," Italy said reluctantly, bringing the pasta (Along with Havoc and Breda) outside. Ed, who had forgotten to eat lunch in all the chaos, followed them.

"So, friend of yours?" Havoc asked Ed, eating his pasta.

"Uh… not exactly," Ed replied. "It's a long story."

"Come to think of it, where's Alphonse?" Breda added, slightly suspicious.

Ed said nothing, staring at the floor instead. This worried the others.

"Edward, did something happen?" Hawkeye asked gently, not wanting to upset the boy.

"…Al's missing," Ed admitted quietly. The office was immediately thrown into chaos.

"What do you mean, 'missing'? How the hell do you lose a six-foot-tall suit of armor?!" Havoc demanded, horrified that anything could possibly happen to sweet little Alphonse.

"That's just it," Ed said, still staring at the floor. "I don't really know what happened. This… portal thing opened up in the middle of the room, and it took him. A few minutes later, this guy showed up." He pointed to Italy.

"That's creepy, man," Breda commented, also somewhat horrified.

"I hope Al's ok," Fuery added, concerned.

"If there's anything we can do to help, let us know," Hawkeye said sincerely.

"Thanks, guys," Ed replied, slightly less upset.

"So who exactly is this guy?" Breda asked, glancing at Italy, who was still serving pasta.

"I have no idea. I think he might be a little bit insane," Ed whispered so Italy couldn't hear him.

"Based on his accent, I'd assume he's from Aerugo," Fallman stated.

"He said he's from somewhere called Italy. He's apparently never heard of Amestris and doesn't recognize anything on the maps."

"Geez, has he been living under a rock?" Havoc mumbled. Ed just shrugged.

"I think you were right, Ed," Breda decided. "He does seem a little bit crazy."

"More like a lot crazy," Havoc agreed.

"He seems nice, though," Fuery pointed out.

"That's what they all say," Havoc said ominously. "Serial killers always seem nice."

"You think they're your friends, but then they mercilessly kill you in your sleep," Breda added.

"Both of you stop it," Hawkeye interrupted, giving the two stern looks.

"Aww, now I'm gonna have nightmares tonight," Fuery whined. "Thanks a lot, guys…"

"At least he seems like a good cook," Fallman said, eating his spaghetti.

"Yeah, assuming it's not poisoned," Havoc replied.

"Or made of ground-up dead bodies."

"Guys!"

"I will shoot you two," Hawkeye informed Havoc and Breda.

"Please don't," Havoc said quietly.

"Then you both better stop it," Hawkeye said firmly. "There's no need to traumatize Fuery."

"Yes, sir," Havoc and Breda mumbled reluctantly.

Italy, meanwhile, was playing with Hawkeye's puppy, Black Hayate.

"Ciao, doggie! Would you like-a some pasta?" Italy said cheerfully, bending down and petting Hayate.

Hayate sniffed him, stared at him strangely, and then licked his hand.

"See? Hayate likes him," Fuery pointed out. "He's a smart dog. He'd bark if something was wrong."

Havoc opened his mouth to say something, recalled Hawkeye's threat to shoot him, and decided it would be smarter to just stay quiet. Accepting defeat, he ate his pasta in silence and watched Italy play with the dog.

"Excuse me! What's the doggie's name?" Italy asked, still petting him.

"Black Hayate," Hawkeye replied.

"Ooh, fancy! That sounds like something Japan would name his dog, although I think he likes cats better," Italy announced, not caring that nobody knew who he was talking about. He suddenly remembered where he was, and felt somewhat lonely.

It's only been a few hours, but I already miss all my friends… I hope everyone is doing ok.

"So what're you gonna do with him?" Breda asked Roy, who had just come out of the office.

"I don't know. I don't think there's exactly a specific protocol for dealing with deranged teenagers with no apparent relatives."

"Who, you mean Ed?" Havoc teased, receiving a dark glare. He shrugged it off. "Really, though, what now?"

"Well he obviously needs somewhere to stay," Riza pointed out.

"Uh… Would it be ok if he stayed with me?" Ed asked awkwardly.

"Absolutely not," Roy replied.

"Why not?!"

"Well for one thing, we don't even know who this guy is, and quite frankly I wouldn't trust you to look after anyone."

"But he could help find Al!" Ed argued.

"No means no, Fullmetal."

"With all due respect, Colonel, I don't see much harm in it," Hawkeye interrupted. "He doesn't exactly seem like a terrorist, and Edward is perfectly capable of handling himself anyway."

"See?! Hawkeye agrees with me!"

"…Fine," Roy agreed reluctantly, sighing. "But no causing trouble."

"Who, me? Causing trouble? What makes you think I would do that?" Ed said, putting on his best innocent face.

"So how many times have you gotten arrested now?" Roy asked, smirking.

"Only that once! Or twice… Actually, maybe a few times... Ok, a lot," Ed admitted.

"Well, don't," Roy replied. "Stay out of trouble. That's an order."

"Yeah, yeah…"

"Ve, is there pasta at your house?" Italy asked, still petting Black Hayate.

"Um… no," Ed replied confusedly.

"Oh." Italy sighed, quite disappointed. "That's ok… I know how to make it, anyway."


	5. Cultural Differences

**((Alright, I miraculously managed to get this all done in two days despite receiving little sleep! And it's actually mostly relevant stuff and not useless filler, huzzah! Things are really starting to pick up now.  
I couldn't resist doing that little nod to HRE at the beginning… I swear, Germany is like a big fluffy walking can of angst. xD))**

Germany stood in the doorway of an unfamiliar room, watching a young girl scrubbing the floor. She wore a green maid dress with a white handkerchief tied around her head, and her hair was messy with a copper curl that seemed familiar, yet Germany couldn't remember where he had seen it. She was singing as she cleaned, a cute, quiet tune about various types of pasta.

Germany stood there for a moment, mesmerized, before the girl saw him.

"Ve! H-holy Rome!" she exclaimed, jumping up. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to slack off like that! P-please don't be angry!"

Confused, Germany stared for a few seconds, before he regained his common sense.

"Ah… No, it's fine," he said awkwardly, blushing slightly.

"So… You're not mad?"

"Of course not. I could never be angry at you," Germany said. He had no idea who that girl was, and yet at the same time, he felt as if he knew her. Whoever she was, she was certainly cute.

Suddenly, Germany heard a loud beeping noise. Shocked, he looked around frantically, searching for the source of the offending noise.

"What's wrong?" the girl asked, frowning.

"Do you hear that?" Germany whispered.

"Hear what?"

"Show yourself, intruder!" Germany shouted, causing the girl to flinch.

"Uwaah! Scary! Holy Rome is scary! I didn't-" Whatever the girl was going to say was drowned out by the beeping, steadily growing in intensity. It seemed to be coming from everywhere at once, assaulting Germany's ears with its shrill cries.

Germany groaned and rolled over, not even bothering to open his eyes.

"Halt dein Mund," he mumbled, smacking his hand around the nightstand until it eventually hit the alarm clock's snooze button.

Sighing, he reluctantly dragged himself out of bed, rubbing the sand from his eyes. Normally he was a fairly light sleeper and didn't have any trouble getting up in the morning, but after the previous day's incidents, he was just exhausted. Ignoring the buzzing in the back of his head, he grabbed some clothes from his closet and went to shower.

He returned a few minutes later, dressed and clean with his hair neatly combed back as usual. Quickly checking the time, he went to make breakfast and wake up his strange houseguest.

Germany carefully knocked on the door of the guest bedroom, waiting for a reply. When none came, he knocked again. When there was still no answer, he hesitantly went in. To his surprise, the room was empty. In fact, it looked as if it hadn't even been touched.

How odd… Did he not go to sleep?

Frowning slightly, Germany decided to check the kitchen instead, thinking that maybe Alphonse had gotten up early and was already eating breakfast. The thought of a stranger eating breakfast in his clean and tidy kitchen without his consent annoyed him, but he decided not to mention it. After all, he was the guest. It would be rude not to let him eat.

He was even more confused when he found the kitchen empty as well. Wondering where he possibly could have gone, Germany began to search the house and soon found Alphonse in the living room, absorbed in a book. He cleared his throat to get his attention.

"Oh! Um, good morning," Alphonse said hurriedly, jumping slightly. "I'm sorry, I didn't see you there. I couldn't sleep so I thought I might as well try to learn a little, I hope you don't mind, I'll put them all back right away-"

"Nein, it's perfectly fine," Germany replied, feeling slightly bad for startling the boy. "I am going to make breakfast. Are you hungry?"

"N-no, I'm fine, but thanks anyway," Alphonse replied awkwardly. Germany frowned, suspicious.

"Alright… Well, come to the kitchen if you change your mind." Germany took one last confused look at the boy before going to make his own breakfast, wondering why he was acting so strange.

Pouring himself a healthy bowl of granola and milk, he decided not to dwell on it and instead picked up the local newspaper. He scanned the front page, yet nothing seemed interesting to him. He felt almost angry at the presses, knowing that Italy was missing, and still the most important story was about the economy. Even if there was no way they could know, and the personifications of countries wasn't knowledge generally shared with the public anyway, he still was enraged that they could possibly care about something as insignificant as money. Didn't it matter to them? Didn't it make a difference at all that Italy, the sweetest and most important person Germany knew, was missing? He was probably terrified and alone, so why didn't they think it was important enough to go in the papers? He threw the paper across the room in anger, watching it land in front of the fridge.

Sighing, Germany sadly reminded himself that it wasn't their fault. He ate the rest of his cereal in silence and cleaned up the kitchen, picking up the newspaper article and laying it back down on the table. After putting the clean dishes away, he went to get ready for the meeting.

"You should get ready to go," he informed Alphonse, who was still reading. "The meeting is in an hour. We're leaving in 5 minutes."

"Ok," Alphonse replied, standing up and putting the books neatly back on the shelf. Germany watched him carefully as he tied his shoes, wondering just what he was hiding. Something seemed off about him, but he couldn't put his finger on it. From what he had been told, Alphonse was from another world, but he still felt as if there was something he wasn't telling him. Something he didn't want to share.

Before he knew it, it was time to go. Grabbing his briefcase, Germany led the way to his car, which was some sort of fancy German car Stella didn't feel like naming because honestly she didn't care about researching cars so let's just call it an Audi. Then he started driving, because that is what one does in a car.

After a totally boring and uneventful car ride, they arrived at Japan's house. Germany rang the doorbell and waited, with Alphonse standing behind him.

"Welcome," Japan said, opening the door and bowing. "The meeting has not yet started, but a few people are here. Please make yourselves at home."

"Thank you," Germany replied, glad they weren't late. Knowing a little of Japanese customs, he took his shoes off and waited for Alphonse to do the same. Alphonse simply stood there confusedly, not sure why Germany and Japan were staring at him like that.

"…Ano… In Japan, it is considered impolite to wear shoes in the house," Japan explained quietly.

"O-oh, uh, I… um… I have… athlete's foot? Yeah… So I have to keep them on," Al said hastily, quite embarrassed.

"I see… Alright then," Japan replied, frowning ever so slightly. He didn't like this behavior, but kept quiet to avoid being rude.

"I'm really sorry," Alphonse insisted, obviously quite upset. "I can wait outside if you want…"

"Please don't worry about it," Japan said, now somewhat flustered. "I understand. Please, do whatever is most comfortable for you."

"Um, ok, thank you. I'm really sorry for all the trouble."

"Don't worry about it," Japan repeated. "Why don't you come inside?"

Alphonse nodded awkwardly and went in, bending down slightly to fit through the doorway. Inside he found Germany talking to a few other people.

"I am going to MURDER that bastard," Romano announced, stomping in circles.

"That makes two of us," Germany mumbled.

"Come on, don't be like that, aru," China said, trying to keep the peace. "It's not Britain's fault. He didn't know this would happen, aru."

"Of course it's his fault!" Romano snapped. "If he didn't know what he was f***ing doing, he shouldn't have been doing it! And who the hell thinks it's a good idea to use humans for test runs, anyway?!"

"Calm down, Romano," Spain pleaded.

"I will NOT calm down!"

"We won't be able to learn anything if we're all fighting," Spain pointed out. "It's best if we all stay calm. You can accuse Englaterra all you like, but it won't help get Ita back. So try to relax, por favor."

"Much as I hate to admit it, he's right," Germany agreed. "I would love to punish Britain for what he's done, but it won't do any good. We need him if we're going to find Italy."

"Then I'll kill him after we get him back," Romano decided.

"We can deal with that later. For now let's just focus on getting Italy back, aru," China insisted.

"Hallo! I brought beer for everyone!" Prussia announced, walking in carrying several cases of German beer.

"Ah, brother. I see you finally got up," Germany said, waving.

"Hey, at least I didn't get into a fight with my alarm clock," Prussia argued, smirking.

"You heard that?!"

"Of course I did! The whole continent heard it! 'Show yourself, intruder!'" Prussia shouted, imitating Germany's voice and flailing around. The whole room started laughing.

"Sh-shut up! I didn't do that!" Germany insisted, blushing bright red.

"Suuuure you didn't, West…"

Germany slammed his head into the wall.

"Please don't give yourself a concussion," Spain said.

"No, by all means, do concuss yourself," Romano argued.

"I am not going to-"

"Yo! How's it going, dudes?" America said loudly, slamming the door open with Canada following quietly behind him.

"Ni hao, America," China said, waving. Canada sighed again.

Soon after, the other countries arrived as well, until the majority of the world was well-represented (And partially drunk, thanks to Prussia). After things quieted down a bit, they began the meeting.

"Alright. Most of you probably already know this, but for those of you who don't, Italy is missing," America announced. A few gasps escaped from the nations that had not been at England's party. Waiting for the panic to die down, America continued speaking.

"Apparently Britain here decided to try some sort of spell or something on him. I don't really know the details, so let's hear it," he said, looking to Germany. Germany cleared his throat and stood up.

"Yes, well… It was about 3:15 yesterday afternoon, at Britain's birthday party. I noticed that Italy was not outside, so I went inside to look for him. I heard a scream in the basement and went to investigate. I saw Italy being pulled into some sort of portal by small black tentacles, which were somehow disintegrating him at the same time. He couldn't break free from their grip, even with my help, and when I tried to sever them the sword went straight through. He disappeared a few moments later."

"Freaky… Ok, Britain, what do you have to say for yourself?" America asked. England stood up, looking exhausted.

"First off, I want to offer my sincere apologies. To everyone. Romano, Germany, Japan, Spain, all of you… I am so, so sorry. I'm an idiot. I never meant for any of this to happen, and I feel so awful. From the bottom of my heart, I am truly sorry," England said sincerely.

There was a respectful silence for a moment as everyone took in his words. Finally, China stood up.

"I may not have the right to say this, since I don't know Italy that well, but… I forgive you, aru," he said.

"So do I," France announced.

"As do I," Austria added.

"I forgive you as well."

"And me."

"I do too."

"It's ok."

"We forgive you, man!"

"I forgive you."

"…I can't say I don't blame you," Germany admitted. "It is your fault. But… I don't hate you. We all do things we regret, things that we can't change. I know this better than anyone. I would be a hypocrite if I refused to forgive you."

"Thank you, everyone. It really means a lot to me," England said quietly, refusing to admit to himself that there were tears in his eyes.

"Now that that's out of the way… What's with the Transformer?" America asked, glancing confusedly at Alphonse.

"A what..?" Alphonse repeated, quite confused.

"A Transformer. You know… Robots in disguise?" America continued, as if this was common knowledge. The entire room stared at him blankly.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what that is… My name is Alphonse Elric," Alphonse replied, "Although you can call me Al if you want to…"

"We found him on the floor a few minutes after Italy disappeared," Germany explained. "I believe it would be logical to assume that wherever he came from, that's where Italy is now."

"So where DID he come from?" Hungary asked.

"I'm from Risembool, in the east," Al replied.

"You're from Prussia? Awesome! Welcome to the club!" Prussia said.

"I don't think he meant THAT east, bastard," Romano pointed out.

"Perhaps he meant the orient?" France suggested.

"Um… Actually, I just meant the eastern region of Amestris," Al admitted.

There was another awkward silence as everyone tried to recall from their geography lessons where exactly Amestris was.

"So, like, where's that?" America asked finally.

"Wait, you mean you don't know what Amestris is?" Al said, confused.

"Well, what country is it in?" Switzerland prompted.

"It IS a country…"

"And here I thought Sealand was weird," England mumbled.

"Here, I have an idea," Spain said, pulling out a world map. "Why don't you show us where it is?"

Al studied the map quietly for a moment, with several people watching.

"…It's not on here," he announced finally.

"You've got to be kidding," America said, sighing.

"How can it not be on there? That's the entire Earth," France insisted.

"Well, it's not the Earth I know," Al replied, shrugging. "Sorry."

"That's impossible," Germany said, crossing his arms.

"Not if he's from another dimension," England pointed out. Most of the other nations started laughing.

"Another dimension?! Ha! Good one!" America shouted, giggling like an idiot. "As if that was possible!"

"I'm not joking! Just because YOU haven't seen them doesn't mean they don't exist," England insisted, glaring.

"Yeah, and so do unicorns," Prussia added, also giggling.

"Who says unicorns don't exist?! And besides, that's not the point."

"Can we please get back to business?" Germany interrupted, annoyed.

"Germany is right," Russia agreed. "We came here to find a way to rescue Italy, da? I do not see how this will help."

"Ok, ok… One thing, though," America said. "If you're not a Transformer, what are you?"

"I'm human," Al replied.

"You don't look like one…"

Al shifted positions nervously and stared at the floor.

"I am," he insisted.

"He's obviously wearing armor," England explained. "Although I must say, it's a few centuries late for that…"

"Nah, I think he's a robot or something," America decided.

"Oh! Oh! Can you shoot lasers from your eyeballs?" Lichtenstein asked excitedly. Switzerland facepalmed.

"What? No… Why would I?" Al replied confusedly.

"All of you shut up," Germany demanded, causing the room to jump. "We didn't come here to discuss robots."

"Perhaps it would be best if we had lunch now," Japan suggested quietly.

Sighing, Germany reluctantly gave in. "Fine. I hope you will all do a better job of actually working after having eaten."

"I will go prepare dinner," Japan announced.

"I'll help, aru," China added.

"So will I," Spain agreed, following the two to the kitchen.

"I still say he's a robot," America whispered loudly. Germany headdesked.


	6. The Magical Filler Chapter of Uselessnes

**((More filler, yay. To be honest I don't know what I was thinking with this chapter... It's short and pointless and makes no sense at all. I've been trying to alternate worlds every chapter, but I've been having a hard time doing the FMA universe chapters, so I might screw the formatting and just write whatever comes out. I don't know.))**

Ed lay in his bed, staring up at the ceiling blankly. The time was 2:27 AM. He had stopped trying to go to sleep hours ago. Ed was no stranger to insomnia, but this time it was worse than ever. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't sleep, not without Al there. Even though Al was usually quiet and still throughout most of the night, something seemed wrong without him. It was like when the power goes out, and everything is silent; You never notice the noise was there before, but once it's gone, everything feels strange and foreign. Ed didn't know what was missing. Maybe it was the way the moonlight reflected off his armor, or the smell of oil and metal, or simply the reassuring knowledge that Al was there, safe and alive and with him. Whatever it was, something was missing, and it was keeping Ed awake.

Sighing, Ed glanced at the clock. 2:28. Why couldn't it be morning? He needed to be out there, looking for a way to get Al back, but there was no way he could get anything useful done when the rest of the world was sleep. All he could do was lie in bed and wait for the sun to come up.

_I wonder if this is how Al feels every night._

And thus came a fresh wave of guilt, tearing a hole in Ed's heart as he recalled just how many ways he had ruined his dear little brother's life. How long had it been now? Three, four years? Yet still Al was trapped in that awful steel prison, only half alive, unable to eat or sleep or feel or do anything normal people did. And as if that wasn't enough, now he was missing. He could be anywhere, all alone, and Ed didn't have a single lead. His only clue was a seemingly insane young man who claimed to be from a country he had never even heard of, much less been to. Even if he interrogated him, it probably wouldn't do much good. Ed hadn't felt so hopeless since the aftermath of That Day.

_I just want Al back… Why won't the world ever leave him alone? He doesn't deserve any of this. Me, maybe, but not him. Never him._

Ed's depressing train of thought was rudely interrupted by the loud growling of his stomach. Deciding he might as well eat, Ed reluctantly dragged himself out of bed and wandering sleepily over to the door. He clumsily felt around for the light switch and flipped it on, quickly shutting his eyes against the blinding light.

"Eeeeeek! Ok, I'm awake, I'm awake! I'm sorry, please don't kill me!" Italy shrieked, jumping up from the couch.

Ed stared at him blankly for a moment, trying to remember why there was a half-naked guy in his apartment.

"…oh… Forgot you were there," he mumbled sleepily, heading to the kitchen. Italy hesitated and then followed him.

"Ve… What are you doing?" Italy asked curiously, glancing over Ed's shoulder.

"Makin' toast," Ed replied, haphazardly shoving a piece of bread in the toaster.

"Oh…"

They waited in silence for a moment, neither quite awake yet not really asleep either, until finally the toast popped. Ed grabbed it and sat down on the small wooden table, smearing a little bit of jam on his toast and eating it with his hands. Italy watched him quietly, thinking.

"What's that?" Italy asked innocently.

"What's what?"

"That." He pointed to Ed's right arm.

"Oh." Ed shrugged. "It's automail."

"Automail? What's that?"

"This is," Ed replied simply.

"…Oh." Italy didn't get it, but decided it must be another thing he was just too stupid to understand.

_Maybe I'll get Germany to explain it to me when I see him again. He's so smart, he knows about everything!_

Italy smiled at the thought of seeing Germany. Even when he wasn't there, Germany always cheered him up, because he was his best friend and that's what best friends do.

"Hey, do you have a best friend?" he asked Ed, curious about his new friend.

"…Huh?"

"A best friend! You know… Someone you spend all your time with, who always makes you happy, and doesn't care if you're stupid and clumsy and threw the wrong grenade and they're always so nice to you!" Italy explained excitedly.

Ed thought about it for a minute, still munching on his toast.

"I guess that would be… My brother, Alphonse," he decided finally. "He's been there for me for as long as I can remember… We always do everything together. I can't imagine living without him."

"I have a brother too! His name is Romano," Italy said, nodding proudly. "He's kind of a jerk, though… But I love him anyway."

"Al's the nicest person I know," Ed admitted, being completely honest.

"He sounds nice. I wonder if he's at my house."

"Wherever he is, I hope he's ok," Ed said worriedly.

"Don't worry! If he ended up at my house, he's probably with Germany," Italy explained. "Germany is kinda strict, but he's really nice and smart and strong. I bet he'll take good care of your fratello," he said reassuringly.

"Al can handle himself… I just don't want him to be scared. He hates being alone," Ed said quietly, staring at the floor. "He's just a kid…"

"It's ok! He won't be alone! I bet he'll make lots of new friends."

"Well, he is good at that…"

"So there's nothing to worry about!" Italy smiled reassuringly. "He'll be just fine."

"Yeah, probably…" Ed felt a little better. Italy seemed fairly trustworthy, and it was true that Al was more than capable of taking care of himself. He still hated being separated from him, but Ed felt better knowing that Al would be ok.

Of course, he was too busy thinking about all this to notice that Italy had stolen the rest of his toast.


End file.
